women and cigars

every morning, I smoke a cigar for 47 minutes.

pacing back and forth, thinking about the modern collapse of masculinity.

but the smoke brings me back to the present moment.

and there she is.

she cooked me eggs wearing nothing but my old t shirt, and for one morning the whole brutal world made sense.

I don't need much from the feminine.

just that.

a warm kitchen, bare thighs, someone humming, and a cuban cigar.

men kill themselves chasing empires when the whole point was always a quiet morning with a woman who stayed.

build the empire.

but know what it's for.

I'm so fucking sick and tired of hearing the same questions over and over again, forced to give the exact same answers.

and I get it.

throughout history, truths of reality were passed from father to son. but today, no one sat you down and told you what a woman is, what her role is, and how you are supposed to deal with her.

no one gave you the rules of how to deal with women.

and i’ve fucked a lot of women, different types, from whores to angels and everything in between.

throughout the process, navigating years of brutal experience in the pickup industry and mastering attraction itself.

I compiled and established the definitive rules on how to deal with women.

so I wrote these imagining I had a son, needing to leave him with something he could easily follow and understand.

and it might also help the 3,512 people who are gonna receive this newsletter.

if you let your woman work a 9 to 5 job, then she’s a whore. and you’re letting her be a hoe because you’re a stupid gay idiot motherfucker.

fully provide for her needs and luxuries.

next time you see your woman, caress her hair and say:

“im so fucking filthy rich you’ll never have to work a day in your life. now suck my dick and get me my coffee”

to provide is to play God in your own microcosm. you absorb the brutality of the world, acting as a shield against the existential dread of survival, so she doesn't have to face it.

there’s nothing more fulfilling in life than providing for your loved ones. watch how beautiful a woman becomes when she doesn’t have to deal with the corporate bullshit. she becomes a woman again.

notice her energy, her moods.. she's alive, enriching. when you remove the burden of survival from her shoulders, the fears in her eyes begin to dissipate. now she’s free to be feminine.

I remember this girl I used to fuck.

she worked some 60 hour a week corporate gig. she’s a fucking beauty and has soft skin. but every night she came home, those eyes were dead. hollowed out.

the machine had scraped all the poetry out of her.

she’d drink half a bottle of wine just to forget the spreadsheets, too exhausted to even smile. there was nothing left for me, and nothing left for her.

that’s what the labor market does. it extracts the soul. it takes an angel, puts her on a cubicle assembly line, and grinds her down into a bitter, stressed-out man with tits.

there’s nothing wrong with making money. but work is a battlefield. you have a target, and you hit it or you die. it requires a cold masculine energy. when you force a woman to wear that armor every day, her feminine core rots.

the best thing about a woman is her feminine energy. her care, her softness, an innocent laugh, a beautiful smile that tells you the war is over for the day. when you provide for her, you take her out of the trenches. you let her take the armor off.

maybe one of the first things you need to understand is that men and women are different. way fucking different.

this is the ancient dichotomy of order and chaos. biology and the cosmos wired us for entirely different realities.

talking with women ain’t the same as talking with your brothers. for men, conversation is a tool… exchange intel, solve the fucking problem, move on. we like it logical and straightforward. we love following a linear path without the vague bullshit to hit the target.

women use conversation to process emotion and build connection.

female conversation typically runs two channels. information on top, emotional connection underneath.

when she tells you about her day, the surface content is the day. the actual message is "connect with me" NOT “solve my problem”

when your woman comes to you with some bullshit, follow this.

you will be shocked how often the answer is the second one, and how much "fixing" was actually you trying to escape the discomfort of her unprocessed emotion.

she really doesn’t want you to solve her problem, she just wants you to be in there with her.

the content is all disposable. the coworker, the drama, the friend's weird comment at lunch.

in twenty years, neither of you will remember a single word of it. its passing weather. but the being-with accumulates

every night you sat and received her world is a permanent deposit in something that outlives every problem either of you will ever have.

on the far end of life, no fucking woman will say "he gave me excellent advice" they say "he was there” and thats more than enough.

everything solvable will be solved or forgotten. presence is the only thing that survives

keep your mission number one, women number two (or even 3, just somewhere in the top 5)

David Deida writes about this perfectly in The Way of the Superior Man:

women fall in love with a man in motion.

this is the ultimate paradox of love: a woman can only fully surrender to a man who has surrendered to a higher absolute.

you’re not allowed to interact with her all the time. only in the morning, then a few times a day just to check in, and then at night.

you must live in a constant state of war, and you can only do that with your brothers. this is critical if you really want to have a great relationship with a woman.

most men spend all day with their women, and if you do that, you’ll fuck it up. your woman will begin to resent you, hate you, and she won't even know it.

she might even compliment you for spending so much time with her, and she might believe it on the surface, but deep down, over time, she’ll begin to hate you.

her soul will scream: wtf are you doing with me when you’re supposed to be going to war with your brothers accomplishing a difficult, excruciating goal?

women don’t really want to be number one.

if she is your god, you are her slave. if your mission is your god, she is your queen.

neediness is the universal solvent of attraction. when your emotional state depends on her approval, you've handed her a man she has to manage instead of a man she can lean on.

direction is attractive in itself. a man going somewhere, building something, training, mastering a craft, generates pull without saying a word. "whatever you want, babe" feels generous and reads as no captain on the ship.

if you're in the middle of a heavy lifting session or closing a deal, and she texts you some dramatic bullshit, you leave her on read for 6 hours.

you do not miss a business meeting because she’s feeling 'lonely'

your work, your craft, the money you’re stacking, that is the engine. she is just sitting shotgun.

the second you pull the car over just to stare at the passenger, she will inevitably leave you for a man who is actually driving.

compliment your woman. the feminine flourishes with empowering words. praise her. men grow via negative reinforcement, “you’re a pussy, scared little bitch”, we get motivated via getting insulted.

women on the other hand, need positive reinforcement.

tell her how sexy she is, how cute she is, how much you love her smile, her ass, her eyes, the way she cooks your food.

compliment the things you want her to keep doing. if you want to tell her to workout, instead of saying she’s fat, tell her, “you’re so fucking hot when you’re working out and sweaty”

slap her ass from time to time, kiss her on the neck and on the forehead often. try giving her 5 to 10 genuine compliments a day and watch her behavior change drastically.

and fuck the shit out of her. hard fuck the shit out of her.

make her cum multiple times before you do. grab her by the hair, bend her over the kitchen counter, and completely obliterate her thoughts.

you want to fuck her so hard her legs shake when she tries to stand up.

that aggressive, animalistic dominance is what she secretly craves when she's scrolling through her boring ass phone all day.

but you also need to know when to pull her into your chest afterward, stroke her hair, and let her fall asleep on you.

you give her the violence she craves, and the absolute safety she needs.

and remember: your woman will test you. 24/7.

can your frame hold when she's emotional? she may not be consciously testing you, but her psyche is calibrating whether you're stable enough to trust with her vulnerability. the man who collapses into appeasement or explodes fails. the man who stays warm, calm, and unmovable, "I'm not going anywhere, and I'm also not doing this circus" passes. steadiness is the answer key.

you ravish her by being the immovable mountain that her chaotic ocean breaks against.

lets say, you’re four hours deep into focused work, stacking cash, and she storms into the room bitching that you didn't text her back or you left a towel on the floor.

she is trying to drag you into her emotional hurricane.

the weak man drops his work, apologizes, or explodes into an argument. he fails. he entered her chaos.

the masculine man doesn't even break eye contact with his screen.

you smirk, tell her to shut the fuck up and bring you a coffee, and go right back to work.

when she sees that her emotional tantrums can't move you one fucking inch, she realizes your frame is unbreakable. you didn't leave, but you didn't join her circus either.

when you’re like that, she understands. deep inside herself, she knows she can trust you to do the exact same thing when real chaotic shit happens. you become the stoic, immovable force she can lean on. that unmovable steadiness is the ultimate aphrodisiac.

if you’re a gay piece of shit and believe in only having one woman for the rest of your life, that's fine. but if you want to ascend to the highest realms of masculinity, you’ll need and want more than one woman.

wife up as many women as possible, provided you can fully take care of them financially and emotionally. I keep two, and occasionally fuck other women.

that's just how we’re built by nature. don’t let the world deceive you by demonizing having more than one.

the hyper masculine man is expansive, he wants more than one woman.

interact with attractive new women at least 10x a week. if you can, go for 30x. this is your training ground.

this will build your character quickly. you must interact with infinite variations of the feminine to understand its singular truth.

get massive, diverse experience. master attraction.

the truth is, you need volume. you have to sleep with a lot of women. it’ll teach you everything you need in life.

it's not really about the sex, or having the ability to get the women you want.

it's about who you become through the fire, the character you build through rejection, failure, and ultimate mastery.

and that mastery bleeds into everything, helping you become better and more formidable in every single aspect of your life.

choose women who choose you. don’t ever chase a woman,

instead, pick the woman who wants you.

if a woman doesn’t want you, no amount of effort or persuasion will change her mind. leave her be.

every man gets his heart broken at some point in his life.

you need to get heartbroken.

you need to fall blindly in love with a hoe and let it destroy you. heartbreak is a life giver, it burns away your weakness and forces your soul to rebuild into something stronger.

never, ever fucking beg a woman to stay, nor force her to.

no matter how hurt you are.

DO NOT pursue a woman once she pulls away. that's a big no no.

suck it up, cry if you want to, its gonna feel like shit for a month or two, fuck it, but don’t you dare beg her to come back no matter how much you want her to stay.

always leave an open door for women to leave.

if you have an argument and she tells you she wants to break up and leave, still take care of her. fetch her a car, give her money (3 months of expenses) so she can adjust since you’re probably taking care of her financially.

be a king to the absolute end. make sure every woman who leaves you gets fully taken care of.

there are 2 types of women: hoes and angels. the profane vs. the sacred.

hoes are hot, fun to be with, and will give you great sexual experiences. angels might seem boring, average, or shy, but they’re the ones you can trust when shit hits the fan.

hot girlfriends are the women who leave when things get hard. angels are the ones who stay and do the dishes.

you know the good life I'm talking about? reaching the highest levels of consciousness, getting your shit together, life maxxing.

that good life requires an unshakable sanctuary at its core. angels are the pillars of that sanctuary.

marry the angels, fuck the hoes occasionally. know the difference between the two. angels first, hoes second.

this is a long conversation, and there will be many more to come. probably around 5-10 articles more, i’ll chip at it here and there.

but for now, i’ll leave you with this.

every standard on this list applies to you doubled. you want a woman who's warm, loyal, secure, and growing? be a man worth that deal.

the highest prize requires absolute sacrifice.

if you want your woman to be loving and giving, you have to out-love and out-give her first.

GIVE MORE THAN YOU TAKE. CONTRIBUTE MORE THAN YOU CONSUME.

get your shit together. find a mission you’re willing to die for, and master every realm of your life as a man.

the rest takes care of itself. getting a beautiful woman is easy as fuck when you’re a highly capable man.

now go back to work.